The biggest Transformer in the series’ history is about to become the biggest Transformers toy ever made, provided that Hasbro can convince 8,000 people to part with a significant chunk of cash. For the low, low price of just $574.99, you too can pre-order the War for Cybertron edition of Unicron, a planet-sized Transformer that is perhaps the least in disguise of them all.
While the photos on this page show Unicron’s master model and not the finished production figure, Hasbro promises that the final Unicron figure will stand over 27 inches tall in robot mode, and feature more than 50 points of articulation. Unicron’s hands alone contain more than 10 points of articulation each, with individually adjustable fingers that are strong enough to hold regular-sized Transformers. In planet mode, Unicron is more than 30 inches wide, with configurable rings and a terrifying maw that opens and closes just like in The Transformers: The Movie, just with less planetary destruction. A heavy-duty stand is included (it’d better be for $575), which is reinforced to handle the 19 pounds that this figure weighs. Dude even has articulated eyes and teeth.
This absurd/amazing Unicron figure is a product of Haslab; Hasbro’s moonshot R&D department. By extension, the crowdfunding campaign takes place on Hasbro’s own marketplace, Hasbro Pulse, but anyone that’s used Kickstarter or Indiegogo will be familiar with the setup. Your bank account is charged as soon as 8,000 people agree to buy this thing, but if the campaign reaches its August 31, 2019 deadline without hitting that goal, your wallet is spared Unicron’s wrath. Provided that the campaign is successful, backers can expect to receive their own tiny agent of unspeakable terror in early 2021. That’s a long time to wait for something that costs more than half a grand, but hey, free shipping!
The campaign’s official site has a behind-the-scenes video detailing the development of this enormous figure, which is worth a glace if only to get a sense of how huge Unicron actually is. Even if I had $575 that I didn’t need, I straight-up don’t have a free space big enough to display it. Plus, it’s gotta be showcased somewhere super stable, especially if you’ve got kids — 19 pounds is a lot of weight to come tumbling down on someone. I’m sure there are at least 8,000 people out there with just under 600 extra dollars, who also have somewhere to properly display and appreciate an extravagance like this Unicron figure, but I can’t imagine what the rest of that life is like.
Unicron is Haslab’s third crowdfunding product, launched shortly after this on-going campaign for a life-size, fully-posable, show-accurate Cookie Monster. Between the two, I’d much rather have Cookie Monster come to life when I’m not looking than Unicron, but then you’ve gotta deal with the huge increase in your grocery budget, not to mention the shedding. Haslab’s first-ever campaign, the “Star Wars The Vintage Collection Jabba’s Sail Barge (The Khetanna),” successfully reached its 5,000 backer goal in spring of last year, and was reportedly shipped out to ILM aficionados last March. That thing ended up being pretty damn sweet, so hopefully Unicron will receive the same level of TLC.