We Need to Change the Way We Talk About Chris Benoit

Leaving aside the issue of individual taste, the former statement is widely held to be true and the later is established fact. If Chris Benoit was anybody else — if he were half the wrestler ...

Big Fishes at the PC: WWE Midcarders Living Their Best Life on NXT

This year’s WrestleMania weekend offered one of WWE’s strongest lineup of matches and sheer spectacle in years. As the kickoff show before WrestleMania, NXT’s don’t-call-it-a-TakeOver Stand & Deli...

The Best Butts in Professional Wrestling

“Booty, booty, booty, booty, rockin’ everywhere!” – Bubba Sparxx “Whatcha gon’ do with all that junk? All that junk inside your trunk?” – Will.I.Am, or maybe the other guy

Reexamining Shawn Michaels Losing His Smile, 25 Years Later

February 13, 1997’s Thursday Raw Thursday special  has, in the past 25 years, become synonymous with one thing: Shawn Michaels, in the process of giving a speech where he vacated the WWF Cha...

Throwback SmackDown Shows that WWE Has Lost Its Grip On Nostalgia

Yesterday was the “Throwback Edition” of WWE SmackDown. Normally, this wouldn’t be something worth writing about, except that the show that normally gets the throwback treatment is Raw, which that has...

Custody of Dominik Mysterio Is One of WWE's Most Contested Titles

At Summerslam 2005, at the culmination of the infamous “I’m Your Papi” storyline, Rey Mysterio defeated Eddie Guerrero in a ladder match to win custody of his (kayfabe adopted but actually legitimate)...

Hitman Hart: Wrestling with Shadows Transcends the Genre It Pioneered

Hitman Hart: Wrestling with Shadows is one of the best documentaries about anything ever. It follows Bret “The Hitman” Hart’s last year in the WWF in 1997, as the promotion battles Ted Turner...

The Night Billy Gunn Broke My Heart

These days, with Supreme Court precedent hopefully decided for good, it’s easy to take gay marriage equality for granted. But in the same way that trans people’s rights to access bathrooms, yo...

The Undertaker Sucked

I’m late to the funeral, but the 2020 Survivor Series is in the books, and with it, for now, the career of The Undertaker. On one hand, WWE’s ceremony was befitting of the man’s legacy—not only di...

The Owen Hart Police Report Is a Chilling Reminder of WWE's History with Worker Safety

Earlier this month, when the coronavirus pandemic and the safety measures designed to slow its spread started threatening not just pro wrestling, but the live event business in general, WWE’s public s...

Eddie Guerrero's Mullet: A Review

I love a good mullet. I love bad mullets and mediocre mullets, too—really the mullet spectrum runs from “person who gives no fucks to a degree that scares me” to “person who gives no fucks and is real...

Every Member of the nWo, Ranked

The new World order are going into the WWE Hall of Fame this year, and while the company is limiting the group to its three founding members, I’d like to believe that the lack of a physical building f...

The 1992 Royal Rumble Holds Up, Even If It’s Older Than You

When it comes to pro wrestling, I almost never feel motivated to watch classics I haven’t seen before. I blame this on how much new wrestling is happening all the time and that like half the reaso...

Wednesday Night War Week 6: A Dialogue!

This week we decided to experiment with a different format: LB Hunktears and Colette Arrand typing paragraphs at each other in Google Docs. It’s kind of like a podcast, but for your eyes. You coul...

Hunktears Recap: WWE Smackdown 4/2/2019

I feel kinda bad for Smackdown right now. They set up two of the biggest storylines going into Wrestlemania, and then got one of them taken away, leaving them with what? Two whole storylines for the w...

The Best Way to Watch WWE is Through Fan-Made Music Videos

Even the best WWE storylines, the ones that mostly make sense and pay off in the end, usually include a lot of filler and at least one creative misstep. Good or bad, angles are often presented in thei...

An Oral History of Dave "The Animal" Batista's Dick

Wrestling fans are, generally speaking, a thirsty people. The way some of y’all talk about this great sport, this legitimate athletic endeavor where it generally behooves a competitor to be smooth, oi...

7 Surprises in WWE the Week of 6/30/2019

News broke last week that Vince McMahon had decided to put Paul Heyman (former ECW impresario, current day onscreen personality) and Eric Bischoff (former guy who ran WCW)  in charge of Raw and S...

Vince McMahon Navigated Controversy for Decades. What Changed in 2022?

What took so long? Seriously, what took so long?

Black Sabbath's "Iron Man" Is Wrestling's Greatest Theme Song

Among other things, last week marked the 50th anniversary of the release of Paranoid, Black Sabbath’s second album of environmentally conscious, doom-laden Christian metal. Unquestionably the...