Death Stranding Pee-S-A: Make Sure to Put Your Dick Away

In Death Stranding, peeing can save your life or get you killed. No, really!

Death Stranding is finally out. Now players can finally learn about some of the more… interesting facets of surviving in the game’s hellish world. You need to worry about balance, ghosts, soothing a cybernetic baby, and bodily functions. Going to the bathroom is particularly useful. You can use it to create weapons that keep BTs at bay. Out in the field, however, peeing has another use; you can unzip and let loose to create glowing mushrooms. Yep! It’s a thing.

In order to pee outdoors, you need to press right on the D-Pad. This will bring up a radially menu of equipment, including the one and only tool that is always on your person. Then you press and hold L2 to aim, plus R2 to “fire.” You will even see how long you can go — measured in milliliters — next to Sam as he does the deed.

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Death Stranding director Hideo Kojima has said that something “good” might happen if enough players pee in the same spot. The game is largely focused on asynchronous multiplayer, where users can’t actually see each other in the game world, but can leave equipment and other goodies behind for friends to pick up later. That goes for the mushrooms, too. Other people’s fungus can show up in your game and vice versa. They also seem to get bigger, depending on the amount of liquid you deploy at one time.

It’s not entirely clear what sort of good thing might happen if enough players do indeed potty in the same place over time. I’m pretty sure I picked up some Cryptobiotes (those floating bugs) near a mushroom formation, once, but that might have been a coincidence. Or maybe more than one thing can happen given enough time. I’m not sure!

One thing I do know, however, is that forgetting to put your dick away is definitely not a good thing. Although it’s happened to me several times already… in Death Stranding, I mean.

On Peeing and Mushrooms in Death Stranding

That’s because the game doesn’t automatically zip you up when you’re done — even if you completely run out of urine. The number that indicates how full your bladder is stays up on the screen, and a lot of the controls no longer function as they should. Holding the left trigger, for instance, is frequently used to shift your balance. But if your Reedus Peebis is still flapping around in the open-world, you will try to “aim” instead.” This will trip you up and force you into some deeply unnecessary (and deeply embarrassing) mistakes.

Much like in real life, putting your dick away isn’t hard. And it will keep you from doing something extremely stupid. You just need to tap right on the D-pad this time. That goes for all equipment in the item menu. You can instantly put it away with a single button press!

The problem, I find, is that the menus and HUD in Death Stranding are both too small and too busy. Your pee meter is small and unassuming: easy to forget about altogether. You would also assume that, once your business is concluded, the game would know to put you back in normal play mode. This is also a game that lets you take showers and forces you to change shoes, though, so maybe it’s all part of the “immersion.”

Whatever the case, remember to put that thing away when it’s not in use. And make sure you know when such use is appropriate. After all, you don’t want to stand in the Timefall (spooky rain), adding to the world’s flooding problems, while your cargo deteriorates! That’s just common sense.

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Steven Strom

An obsessive writer broadcasting to you live from the middle of nowhere. Thinks cute things are good, actually.

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