Sony has announced a new date for its historic(?) digital unveiling of the PlayStation 5: this Thursday, June 11 at 1 p.m. Pacific/8 p.m. British (4 p.m. Eastern (3 p.m. Peru)), at PlayStation Dot Com Slash PS5. You might remember earlier this month when Sony delayed the event past its original date of June 4, out of respect for the intensely justified protests against police brutality happening around the nation (and world!) following the Memorial Day killing of George Floyd by four officers from the Minneapolis Police Department.
If recent scuttlebutt proves accurate, Thursday’s event will be our first look at real, actual first-party PlayStation 5 games, along with the console itself. The PlayStation 5’s new controller, the DualSense, was revealed 10,000 years ago in early April, while the first third-party PlayStation 5 game was shown off during last year’s Game Awards. That title, Godfall, is also coming to PC, and since then other games like genitalia simulator Cyberpunk 2077 have been confirmed as cross-generational, so Thursday should be our first real look at some Real Deal with Bill McNeal PlayStation 5 games.
As for the actual console itself, we’ve seen leaked images of developer consoles out in the wild for a few months now, but Sony has a long and storied history of producing developer units that look nothing like the final product. The PlayStation 4 dev kit, for instance, looked like a piece of rack-mounted server hardware, and the PlayStation 3’s kit looked like the kind of hi-fi media receivers that grandpas have. The PlayStation 5’s kit definitely broke the mold by taking on more of a “vaporware console from 2004” kinda vibe, but as for the real console’s look, it’s anybody’s guess. My guess is that it’s a completely featureless black and grey rectangle because fun is dead!
Maybe I’m just slowly being pulled back into the earth by the cold, skeletal hands of entropy, but I miss the days when finding out what a new console looked like was the most surprising part of each new generation. Nowadays it’s basically guaranteed that it’ll be some combination of black parallelograms and/or rectangles, with the occasional square thrown in for flavor. Even Nintendo’s latest console is a nondescript black primary shape when you really get down to it, and Nintendo used to be the company willing to do this.
What happened, y’all? When did we lose our way? I get that it partly has to do with the industry trying (and succeeding) to rehab its “for kids!” image, and that some Adult Gamers™ actually want a black box to match all the other black boxes in immediate proximity to their TV, but that’s just not where I’m at. I want curves! I want color! I want to actually remember what the console looks like without having to Google a reference image, which I literally cannot do with the Xbox One or One X! Hopefully I’m wrong and Sony will unveil a translucent orange sphere on Thursday, but my gut tells me that, at best, we’ll get some RGB lights to go with our flat surfaces and sharp edges.