PUBG Mobile isn’t known for being a particularly generous game. Games like Dragalia Lost toss gatcha pulls at you like Halloween candy, while Tencent’s big battle royale floods your screen with a million and one reasons to give it your cold, hard cash. And sure! You can tap almost anywhere at any time and get some “free stuff,” but very rarely is it anything worth having. Want that cute new Youth Enforcer set? Give them $2 and you might get an old shoe. Give them $20 and you might get a nice sticker. But hey, at least you can another roll in a similarly worthless banner as a consolation prize for your patronage, eh?
But this week, Tencent seemed like Ebenezer Scrooge after his jolly chat with a bunch of ghosts on Christmas Eve. They tossed 300,000 Metro Cash at everyone as an apology for some issues with the mode most were probably unaware of. That wad of cash isn’t going to get you a single cool or cute skin, but it can get you some good supplies to use in the addictive new survival mode. So what’s the catch? Unlike when your racist uncle slips you a $20 bill and says “don’t spend it all in one place,” that’s all you can do this time around, so we’ve rounded up the worst ways to spend it based on five different personality types.
The 5 Worst Ways To Spend 300,000 Metro Cash Based On Your Personality
Items: Lv. 4 Armor Pack
Reason: If you’re the kind of person who gets roped into the thrill of Black Friday discounts and signing contracts without reading the fingerprint, here’s one for you. Toss Uncle Tencent’s cash down on Lv. 4 Armor Pack and you’ll be the proud (broke) owner of a single piece of Lv. 4 Armor. That’s right, 300,000 gets you a random piece. A select piece costs less than that, but by taking a chance, you can get there without the Level 8 requirement and have a slim chance of getting the One-Eyed Cobra vest that “protects the upper arms and thighs” too.
- It could pay for itself in prevented deaths.
- What did your racist uncle just say?
Items: Lv. 3 Armor Set and the AKM assault rifle.
Reason: You’re yet to make it out of Metro Royale alive, but you’re determined to try again and again. With Uncle Tencent’s generous payout, you can’t wait to get stuck into another round, determined that your new loadout will get you that first irradiated chicken dinner. You’re all kitted out in tough combat armor and your new AKM looks ready to rock. You spot an enemy before they spot you, you pull the trigger, and you hear that distinct click. You forgot to buy ammo, didn’t you?
- Plenty of prevented damage and a wild gun with serious stopping power
- Choice of gun gives your racist uncle verbal ammunition.
- Recoil makes you miss half your shots and you lose a duel anyway.
- You actually make no shots because you forgot to budget for ammo.
Items: 33 Molotov cocktails. That’s it.
Reason: You played too much GTA III back in the day, slamming cheat codes in with your controller just to set the world aflame. For a kid, finding out what a bottle of vodka, a rag, and a zippo lighter can do is like forbidden knowledge. You’ll want to try it, but (hopefully) you know better. So why not do it in PUBG Mobile instead? Live a little and properly singe your toes while you’re at it.
- It’s 33 Molotov cocktails!
- It’s 33 Molotov cocktails.
Items: 12,500 (Corroded) Steel Balls. They’re inert.
Reason: Though you probably haven’t ever played pachinko yourself, you’ve seen enough videos with titles like “ANIME CASINO?! Japan’s STRANGEST Obsession” to know you absolutely love the idea of spending your cash on little metal balls. It’s loud, flashy, and it reminds you of that time you triggered multiball at an arcade and felt like a god. You don’t care what they’re for in-game, though. There’s no pachinko in hell. You just want to go into a match and say stuff like “Haha, look at my balls.” before getting your entire team killed through an unfortunate lack of firepower.
- Will have you bowling over like a cartoon character if you drop them.
Items: Night vision Helmet and 53 lukewarm energy drinks.
Reason: You’re a big fan of Splinter Cell. Instead of dreaming of the day you’ll embody Sam Fisher and thwart a local drug dealer by hiding in the shadows and chugging caffeine-infused sewer water to stay awake, why not spend 300,000 Metro Cash to camp by the zone exit instead? You won’t have to leave your home, for one.
- Ubisoft might hire you to make the next Splinter Cell game.
- It’s a pachinko machine.
Disclaimer: Fanbyte is owned by Tencent, which also runs Tencent Games, developer and publisher of PUBG Mobile. Tencent also subsidizes much of Fanbyte’s PUBG Mobile coverage by covering freelancer budget costs. Those covering PUBG Mobile for the site have no contact with Tencent, however, and are given complete creative control to write whatever they wish.