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lb hunktears

(they/them)

LB Hunktears is Fanbyte's Social Editor+ and co-host of Friends Reunion. They mostly write about 2D boys and fast cars. LB is also in charge of Fanbyte's ongoing project to destroy the vile Count Dracula.


The Cricket in My Living Room, a Review

In the last month or so, a cricket has moved in with me. After spending a solid amount of time with him, I thought the experience was worth reviewing. This male cricket lives in my living room, I think. I guess he could be in a kitchen cabinet like right…

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MICROREVIEWS

Ranking 2020’s Wrestling Merch Offerings (Based on How Much I Want It)

Wow, the holidays are here again. As much as I do not want to admit that because it means I have to acknowledge the passage of time and the entire year I have lost, it’s December. That means it’s time for some people to buy presents to give to other…

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WRESTLING

Kirkland Signature 10″ Chocolate Cake Filled with Chocolate Mousse, a Review

Earlier this week, on Fanbyte podcast West Coast Office Hours, I found out that you no longer need to be a member to shop at Costco. To celebrate that, I got some stuff from Costco, including a cake. This cake. This Kirkland Signature 10″ Chocolate Cake Filled with Chocolate Mousse…

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MICROREVIEWS

What You Need to Know to Watch the Heaven Official’s Blessing Donghua

Update: As of April, 2021, the first season of Heaven Official’s Blessing can be streamed on Netflix, BiliBili, and Funimation. There is no release date yet for the second season, which has been announced. With Funimation announcing, one day before the show’s premiere, that they are dipping into the world…

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How Is Pro Wrestling During a Pandemic Going?

Fanfyte was founded a year ago to coincide with what looked like a big boom in the world of pro wrestling. AEW premiering a weekly national TV show to rival WWE? The biggest promotions in Japan and Mexico finally easily accessible internationally via streaming? Independent wrestling having exciting, experimental, fun…

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WRESTLING

Adam Cole is 6’6″

What is height? According to the eggheads at NASA, height is how tall something is, measured in objective terms like feet and inches and centimeters. You go to the doctor and they lift the big metal stick on the scale and they say, yes, this is how big you are,…

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WRESTLING

Fanfyte Editorial Statement on #SpeakingOut

[Content Warning on this piece for discussion of sexual violence and trauma.] It feels odd to ask people to care about wrestling right now. This has been a theme in pretty much everything we’ve published in the last three months, but it’s the truth. In April I asked why pro…

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WRESTLING

Fanfyte VCR 3: Step 1 Look At Vader Step 2 Feel Good

We’re back and still in Japan in the 90s! This time though Colette Arrand and LB Hunktears get into the infamous Vader vs Stan Hansen match from 1990. How on topic did we manage to be??? Not very!! But this match ruled! And LB tried to wear a child’s cowboy…

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PODCASTS

It’s Time to Raise Our Expectations of Pro Wrestling

The thing about pro wrestling is that the bar is low. Like really low. Like really, really low. Like all a wrestling promoter needs to do to be a shining example of what a wrestling promoter should be is pay the talent fairly and on time. All a wrestler needs…

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WRESTLING

Fanfyte VCR 2: A Good Use of Cargo Pants

LB Hunktears and Colette Arrand are back with another episode to talk about the 1994 FMW No Ropes Exploding Barbed Wire Dynamite Pool Elimination Death Match. You know, where everyone rode a dinghy to get to the ring because it was in the middle of an enormous swimming pool. Colette…

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WRESTLING

Tony Schiavone Said “Hentai” on TNT: AEW Dynamite Recap

Other people have said it. And said it. And said it again. They’ve said it better than I could, in so many different ways, and I’m still here to say once again that the task of writing about professional wrestling right now is a bizarre one. I wonder what it…

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WRESTLING

Fanfyte VCR 1: I Quit

LB Hunktears and Colette Arrand embark on a beautiful journey into watching old wrestling on the computer and pretending it’s on a tape in this new Fanfyte podcast. To get started, we watched Terry Funk and Ric Flair’s “I Quit” match from 1989. Also: how would you feel about giving…

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WRESTLING

What Wrestling Should You Watch This Week (3/16/20)

It’s a pandemic baby! Aside from AEW and WWE continuing to run limited versions of their weekly shows, there’s not a lot of new wrestling happening this week. Still, that isn’t stopping streaming services like IWTV from reaching into the vault for stuff to play all day long, entertaining people…

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WRESTLING

Celebrate International Women’s Day on Classic Joshi YouTube

International Women’s Day was declared 110 years ago at a conference of socialist feminists. Today it is celebrated by non-socialists all over the world. Shell Oil is celebrating by changing their name to She’ll Oil. WWE will celebrate it today by putting a bunch of women in tubes to sort…

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WRESTLING

Paradigm Shift: AEW Revolution Recap & Review

A long time ago, I was a very serious history major at a very serious college. I never thought about muscles or suplexes or anything cool like that. And then I dropped out, and now I write about muscle photos. It’s a lot more fun. Like, when you’re writing about…

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WRESTLING

Tag Team Group Therapy: AEW Dynamite Recap

It was the last episode of Dynamite before the big Revolution PPV on Saturday, and it was a good one? Like, a really good one. The only matches or segments you could really call “skippable” were still super entertaining to watch. AEW really seems to have figured out how to put…

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WRESTLING

Take My AEW Revolution: Revolution Card Preview

My main question about AEW Revolution is who, in this massive roster of nerds, is going to be the one lucky enough to do a Revolutionary Girl Utena cosplay for the first All Elite Wrestling PPV of 2020. Instead of predicting match winners, which, let’s be real, I am very bad…

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WRESTLING

5 People I’d Like to See Lance Archer Wrestle in AEW

In a press release today, AEW announced that former United States IWGP Champion and current very tall and awesome man Lance Archer has signed a multi-year contract with them. I’ve been a fan of Archer’s since I saw him at my first live New Japan event and realized he has…

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WRESTLING

Let’s Imagine the Ideal AEW Action Figure Collection

Last night during Dynamite, All Elite Wrestling announced the AEW UNRIVALED line of action figures made by Jazwares (the company that does Fortnite and Roblox toys). It comes as no surprise that AEW, a company run by total nerds who definitely love figures, have very good looking prototypes for their…

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WRESTLING

Valentine’s Day Special: The Roppongi 3K Photobook Review

As New Japan reminds us on their Japanese language web presence, and absolutely refuses to address on their English accounts and sites, today is Valentine’s Day. Last month, I reviewed their Pectoral Encyclopedia, so this month I thought I would pick something more romantic. The Roppongi 3K photobook came out…

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WRESTLING